SCANNING CLEARANCE LEVEL...
Clearance accepted. Greetings, researcher.
Do proceed, once you've prepared. Beware the embedded memetic kill agents.
SCAN OF DOCUMENT FINDS NO EMBEDDED MEMETIC HAZARDS.
Item #: Designation pending. Temporarily designated SCP-5480.
Object Class: Thaumiel
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5480's primary presence is to be kept within a multi-page document hosted on the service "█████" (from here on, referred to as SCP-5840-A). SCP-5840-A is to be formatted as close to the Foundation's standard documentation procedures as can be managed within the parameters of the host. SCP-5480 is contained within the document itself, in the form of a memetic entity.
Description: CREDENTIAL INPUT REQUIRED.
Description: SCP-5480 appears to be an average Caucasian female. Approximately 19 years of age, mid-torso length black hair, dyed a red-orange on the ends. Blue-grey eyes, approximately 1.7 meters in height. She is generally affable and understanding when approached, but scares easily. A list of "triggers" has been assembled in Appendix 5480-1.
Anomalous properties appear to manifest upon sustained contact with SCP-5480. Most sentient beings, upon sustained conversational activity with SCP-5480, will feel inclined to treat it with kindness, regardless of set precedent in regards to the being's confrontational manner.
(Demand from O5 Council: Do not test SCP-5480 with Keter- or Apollyon-level threats unless absolutely required.)
Anomalous properties extend to most Foundation researchers, as well; when approached, researchers refer to it by name ("Rose"), as opposed to the standard nomenclature. (See Appendix 5480-2.) Documentation used to avoid anomalous effects is the reason for SCP-5480-A; representing the subject on a separate document adds a layer of division that said anomaly appears to be unable to break through.
More information can be found in the Appendices.
Appendix 5480-2: Experiment log, dated 12/██/████.
<Begin log. Researcher █████ enters the room, and is greeted by SCP-5480. They return the greeting in kind, and sit down.>
Dr. █████: Hello, Rose.
SCP-5480: Good evening. Is it evening? I'm not certain.
Dr. █████: It is currently ██:██ in the afternoon.
SCP-5480: Aha, point Rose. Someone should really keep track of these.
<Both Researcher █████ and SCP-5480 laugh.>
SCP-5480: But, what brings you here? Typically you all need some help with something, but I don't believe there's been any breaches recently?
Dr. █████: You would be right about that, yes. Plus, O5 recently barred us from using your anomalous properties outside of definite emergencies.
<SCP-5480 frowns at this.>
SCP-5480: That's a shame. I quite enjoyed being able to help, even if it was... frankly, terrifying, every time.
Dr. █████: The rest of the team assigned to you doesn't really mind. It was quite stressful for us, despite the breaches being more urgent at the time.
SCP-5480: Aw, ████. It's kind of you to worry about me like that, but it's okay. <It smiles, before waving a hand.>
SCP-5480: But before we get off-track again, what'd you need?
Dr. █████: Ah, Dr. ██████ sent me over to try to find out more about you. Acquire some documentation on your personal history for the sake of clarity, and such.
<This appears to surprise SCP-5480.>
SCP-5480: Oh! Well, I don't mind. Perhaps this would be best carried out via me writing down some things about myself directly onto a notebook, as opposed to operating through a translator or other, miscellaneous intermediary?
Dr. █████: Yes, I had the same thought. I went ahead and acquired some materials for you to use in advance.
<Dr. █████ hands them over.>
SCP-5480: Alright. I'll get to work on this, and the next time you stop by, I'll hand it over to you. Does that work?
Dr. █████: It most certainly does. As always, it's been a pleasure, Rose.
SCP-5480: Stop by any time, ████.
<End log. Document mentioned attached.>
Appendix 5480-2, continued: Acquired document from SCP-5480, contains personal details. Redactions only where necessary.
Um, hi. So, ████ told me I needed to- oh, wait... that's Dr. █████, in a more professional context. Right. Dr. █████ informed me that a paper detailing some of my more personal information would be useful, and, well, while I'm in containment, it's not like privacy is much of a concern anymore, ahaha. So, where to start... well, my name is Rose. Rose Noelle Lalonde is my full name, actually. I'm... around 19 years old, I believe? It's kind of fuzzy... but, my birthday is somewhere in August. Perhaps the 25th. I'm a female, obviously. I very much enjoy writing, as well as reading, in whatever circumstances. I also play video games occasionally, but that's more rare... I also enjoy playing and creating music. I started out with a piano, but now I tend to just make it on the computer, ahaha. I also really, really enjoy being able to take care of my friends. (List of previous associates located in Appendix 5480-3.)
Oh, wait, before I forget! I'm sure at least one of you is wondering about the name thing -- more specifically, the fact that I share it with a fictional character -- and this is for a reason. I'm really into kinning, and I relate to (fictional) Rose really, really hard. She's basically just me, so... there's that.
But, yeah, I think that's about all? I guess I can include some minor details here. Um... hm. I'm a Virgo. In Homestuck terms, I'm a Seer of Light, and I'm a Derse dreamer. I'm also an ISFJ, and my Enneagram is 6w5, for whatever that's worth. I... am all out of minor tidbits. So, that's all, I guess! Although... I should really make a separate page about the kin list, just for thoroughness.
Flip over to next page!
Referenced document attached.
Appendix 5480-2, continued: A document containing SCP-5480's "kins". Foundation additions, typically adding the appropriate media, will be bolded for clarity.
Selfhoods: Rose Lalonde (Homestuck), Kanaya Maryam (Homestuck), Hermione Granger (Harry Potter), and Monika (Doki Doki Literature Club)
IDs: Rose Tyler (Doctor Who), Roxy Lalonde (Homestuck), and Chell (Portal)
Primaries: Porrim Maryam (Homestuck), Vicky Schmidt (Monster Prom), and Aradia Megido (Homestuck)
Secondaries: Wendy Corduroy (Gravity Falls) and Clara Oswald (Doctor Who)
Synpaths: Angela Ziegler (Overwatch) and Ellsee Raines (Vast Error)
Note: I don't think this is much of a risk, but just in case another Foundation agent out there happens to kin, doubles are cool, except for Rose and Kanaya. (Doubles, in this case, appears to be a reference to other people "kinning" the same character.)
(Researcher's note: I may have only just found out what kinning is, but if I'm understanding this properly, SCP-5480 has stellar taste. - Dr. █████)
(Researchers will refrain from adding personal opinions to SCP-5480-A. - Site Director ██████.)
Appendix 5480-3: A list of all known previous associates of SCP-5480.
1: A boyfriend. Name, Reed █████. Location, ██████████. Use of Class C amnestics authorized, if SCP-5480 breaches containment.
2. A "moirail", in SCP-5480's terms. (Used as a term of endearment within the community surrounding the webcomic "Homestuck".) Name, Chloe ██████. Location, █████████. Use of Class C amnestics authorized, if SCP-5480 breaches containment.
3. Several close friends. Names, Alejandro ██████, Elias ████████. Locations, ███ ████. No known threat posed by containment of SCP-5480.
4. Various writing groups, once again centering around the community of the webcomic "Homestuck". Too many to name. No known threat posed by containment of SCP-5480.
Appendix 5480-1: A list of SCP-5480's triggers. Tends to result in symptoms in line with an anxiety attack, if pressed.
1. Conversation surrounding alcoholic beverages, or drug use.
2. Any pictures of insects, regardless of perceived size or innocence.
3. Consistent references to self-harm.
4. Any raised voices. However, this tends to vary, depending on how SCP-5480 perceives the yelling. It will trigger if it appears to the subject that the yelling is caused out of anger.
5. Physical and mental harm to the subject.